Doctor II

The Gang : *talk cock talk cock, laugh laugh laugh*

dS : arghhh!! fuck!

dW : y? y?

dS : dunno. here pain. *points to chest, left side, 3 fingers under the nipple.*

dWcbf : need to go doc?

dS : no need no need. i got dr.google.

dWc : ha? u siao ah?

dS : it works lah. lets go home.

*10 mins later*

dS : computer, search google for sharp chest pain.

dCom : SIR! YES SIR!!! Seach completed. Here are the results.

dS : thank you. huh? vagina? Angina? your head!! Asthma? your head! Pneumonia? your head! probably just pulled a muscle or something. /ignore pain. zzz

*2 days later*

dS : good morning dr.mohan.

dr : g'morn. flu?

dS : chest pain.

dr : when?

dS : 2 nights ago.

dr : ate ur dinner on time?

dS : yes.

dr : what?

dS : dinner was rib eye black pepper steak. supper was roti telur bawang.

dr : emm, nice. not spicy = not gastric. lie down. take it off.

dS : *take off shirt. lay down*

dr : here pain? *poke poke*

ds : owww... mcbknnpukiama...

dr : hmm... lifted anything heavy recently? stretched?

ds : erm, no, does drifting down karak highway on a power steering, manual car counts as heavy?

dr : no. any old injuries?

dS : ermm... let me see, leg from football, thigh from bmx stunt, shoulders from gun, head from high jump... ermmm... thats about it.

dr : k, we are done. u have Costochondritis. i'm giving u Mobic-Meloxicam. 2 a day.enjoy...

dS : kthxbais. *RM25 burnt*

Wheres my house?

@#$@%#^$%^&&$%@#$ourlandofficesucks@#$@%#^$&$^#@#$!!!

WTF? Our bid to buy over the current apartment that we are staying has been rejected by the land office. The fucking reason given was its a bumi unit. WTF!!! The first buyer was European. The 2nd owner was cChinese. The current owner is a Malay who bought it over from the Chinese.

WTF bumi unit? Fark! Our option now is to appeal which someone else says chances are damn low that they will allow or just not continue with the buying process. If we decide to not continue, our fees to the lawyers would be burnt.

How now brown cow? Argghhhh... I don't know what to do. I hate not being in control. External variables suck! What a way to start a holiday.

Doctor

dS : doc, eye pain. headache. 2 days dy.

doc : do u c things like lines and halucinations?

dS : no. no aura.

doc : hmm... you have migraine. go http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/003024.htm

dS : thx Dr.Google.

*dS leaves to play Mortal Kombat - Shaolin Monk*

Conclusion

Over the years of living with them. Dating them. Just being friends with them, I have come to my conclusion. Neh... learn.

1. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be fucking castrated.

2. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.

3. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.

4. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.

5. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.

6. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.

7. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5 If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like starved tigers.

Telemarketer

TM : hello, Mr.dS?

dS : speaking. hamisu? (whats u wan?)

TM : i am Stella here from Celebrity Fitness. you friend..

dS : sorry? whats that again?

TM : i am Stella, from..

dS : can u speak louder?

TM : MY NAME IS STELLA, FROM..

dS : oh, i heard u the first time. anyway, i'm busy, could you give me your home number so that i can call u back later?

TM : sorry, i'm afraid..

dS : huh? wats that?

TM : SORRY!! I CAN'T GIVE YOU MY PHONE NUMBER.

dS : oh, in that case, (change to sexy voice) what are u wearing?

TM : HUH?!! siao!!

T610 : *beep beep beep*

-----------------------------------------

LOL... bloody cipet telemarketers. here are some other ways for you to make sure they don't ever call you back.

If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my dick is sore, my dog just died . . . "

If they say they're Alvin from Upyours Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

This works great if you are male. Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Lily and I'm with Upyours Company. " You: Wait for a second and with a real sexy voice ask, "What are you wearing?"

Act surprised like, "Lily? Is that you? Oh my God! Lily, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Lily a few panicky seconds as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

If its a cleaning company, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company, and they can't sell to employees.

Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, scream, "Oh my God!" and then hang up.

Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me also lahhhhh!" Hang up.

Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.

Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation.

Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I'll listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

Insist that the caller is really one of your friend, playing a joke. "Come on, Fariz, cut it out! Seriously, Fariz, how's your wife? Has she recovered from the orgy last night?"

Tell them to talk very slowly, because you want to write every word down. Spell each and everyword and try to confirm the spelling with them.

Lolita - New Toy

Hi! Lolita here. dSaint is busy reconfiguring the Compaq. I just want to say that dSaint is the best!!! He really loves me a lot.

Yesterday I was sick. My self-defence skill got hit by bird flu. Whenever I'm violated, I find myself muted. I could not scream for help. I could not call dSaint to rescue me. Thank God dSaint found out and with his and dWife's love, they have given me a new self-defence skill.

Now, not only I can scream, but I can warn off little kids who loves to caress my spotlights. I can scare the cats who loves to sleep under and above me too. Wee!!!

If there is someone besides dSaint driving me, I can lock myself between my legs and no one but dSaint can open me up. mmmm... What I love about my new toy is dSaint can warm me up way before he touches me. I love it!!! I love it!!!

Thank you dWife and dSaint. I love my pet Viper.

My Puasa

Today.... I puasa. Whole day long I puasa from being online. Our offices' fucking Streamyx was down since yesterday. Came back up about 5 just now.

Lets see... what did I do the whole day?

1) 09 a.m - read newspaper, drink coffee, eat crackers and fag.
2) 10 a.m - played StarCraft with colleagues.
3) 11 a.m - operate on a Pentium II IBM laptop to extract HDD.
4) 12 noon - operate on Pentium III Compaq to replace its HDD with the IBM HDD.
5) 12.30 p.m - reinstall OS on Compaq.
6) LUNCH
7) 1.30 p.m - continue reinstalling OS.
8) 2 p.m - reinstall all software.
9) 4 p.m - start reading Naruto manga.
10) 5 p.m - Streamyx up. Blogging.

What a makacibaifooking day. And Rkaru has a superb time snaking somemore. *jealous jealous*

Papaya Farm

After lunch, on the way back to office, listening to MixFM.

MixFM : *playing some 80s disco song*

dColl1 : wahh... this song, reminds me of my disco days.

dColl2 : wahhh miss dColl1, u go disco?

dColl1 : yeah, 1 or 2 years only, enjoy your youth ma.

dS : damn happening.

*short comfortable silence*

dS : how about u dColl2? been to any clubs?

dColl2 : nope. i only go wet markets.

dS : fuck u lah, xColl told me u go papaya farm.

dColl1 : O_o"

dColl2 : eh dS, wat is papaya farm?

dS : err, u ask dColl1, she got the "tools" to explain better. its some place where ppl plant papaya la.

dColl1 : no la, not "plant", its "pluck". *teeheehee*

dS : oh yeah, "pluck". also, u need to avoid the "papaya milk". else u'll feel "itchy". :P

dColl1 : *rotbslolwluita* (rolling on the backseat laughing out loud with legs up in the air)

dColl2 : *10cent face*

Creepy

I was bathing around 1am the other day. As usual, I shampoo my hair first then proceeded to fapfapfap soap myself. Naturally, my eyes were close. The sting in the eye caused by shampoo is seriously a bitch to wash off.

As I soap along my body, I felt a part of my head as if it was being caressed by someone. I know no one is in the bathroom with me. Instantly goosebumps appeared and my heart raced to 1000 beats a second.

Fuck shampoo stings, I opened my eyes and checked around. Nothing. The hair at the back of my neck is already standing like a porcupine. In less than a minute, I was dressed. No explaination. No need. I went to sleep.

Another time and day, my colleague and I was in a lift at Isetan. Just the two of us. We were on the way up to the 5th floor. At the 3rd, the lift halted to a stop. Two old cleaning ladies were outside, hesitating to come in. They stared at dColl who was holding the door open, then proceeded said, "its ok, we'll wait for the next one". So dColl released the door. As the doors were closing, we heard one of them saying to the other, "so late dy still the lift so crowded". -_-"

Now, go here and play the game. For maximum effect, turn on your speakers. Not too loud, just enough to hear is sufficiant. Have fun!

ST's Present

Two days ago was Shaolin Tiger's 1st year blog anniversary. Well, what better way to share a song just for it eh?

And since I've been posting a lot of hari raya songs without even one deepavali song, this one could possibly be the nearest that I can get my hands on (no worries, its not the Twinkle Twinkle Litte Star song). Woo hoo! 2 for the price of 1.

Shaolin Tiger's Present

If you are an Ah Beng wannabe, this is perfect. Tune your EQ to 6-7 and head bop all the way to hell, you too-much-money-and-no-place-to-spend mofos!

Divorce

Wingz told me he received a heart wrenching letter last night. I can't believe it when he forwarded the letter to me. Below is a copy of the letter.


Dear Winggy Binggy :

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game.


You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.


P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to Tioman together! Have a great life!

Your EX-Wife


Teruk kan? This morning, I saw Ex-Mrs.Wingz driving. Guess whats hanging on her rear view mirror.


A quick message to Wingz later told me he is ok. Castrated only. *phew* Then he proceeded to ask me to do him a favour. He wanted me to send the following letter to his ex-wife. Should I? Here, you read it and tell me what to do.


Dearest Ex-Wifey Winggly,


Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.

When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was RM49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit Damacai for three million ringgit, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Hawaii.

But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a cent from me. So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

Signed
Rich As Hell and Free!

Lord of War

Another superb movie!! woo hoo!! Nicholas Cage was superb! Ethan Hawke was pathetic. I won't say much. Check out these TRUE FACTS!

1) According to Andrew Niccol (writer), the filmmakers worked with actual gunrunners in the making of the film. The tanks lined up for sale were owned by a gunrunner who had to have them back to sell to another country. They used a real stockpile of over 3,000 AK-47s because it was cheaper than getting prop guns. The gunrunners were more cooperative and efficient than the studio or the crew.

2) This film is based on actual events.

3) Yuri Orlov is a composite of five real arms dealers.

4) No US studios would back the film. Foreign finances were secure instead.

5) The area code of the phone number on Valentine's business card is that of Cental Iowa.

6) The tanks seen in the movie were real and belonged to a Czech arms-dealer.

7) Before shooting the scene where tanks were lined up for sale, the filmmaker had to warn NATO, lest they think a real war was being started when they see satellite images of the set.

No romance scenes. A few nipple shots. Not very fast pace yet not slow too. Superb!

Lagu Raya III

Parts I and II.


Raihan & Nowseeheart - Hari Raya Untuk Semua
Raihan, Nowseeheart, Ajai & Rem - Lebaran
Saloma - Selamat Hari Raya
Sharifah Aini - Suasana Hari Raya
Siti Nurhaliza - Suara Takbir
Part III.

Good Deed

Normally I don't advocate donations and the likes over the net. Heck! I don't even do it if the person comes to me face to face. People that approaches me during lunch and showing me pictures of pandas, tigers, old men... deserves to have a chopstick stuck up their urethra. A man is trying to eat here. Damn!

Before you judge me, I do my part too. But thats for another post, another time. I feel that I should redirect your focus on someone who has the balls to do something I'd never do. Profound Sentiments of the Demented Soul has pledged to go bald! Imagine, a woman going bald for the sake of charity. I for one will never do it. Yes, I'm too vain. I love my hair too much.

Apparently she was so moved by Peter Tan that she decided to make the plunge too. R.E.S.P.E.C.T!!

For more information, please visit their blogs and if you can afford it, donate. They are still short of about 3++k. To you motherfuckers who earn a shit load of money, here is a chance for you to get tax exemptions.

Lullaby

dW : honey... goodnight.

dS : nite nite. *kiss eyes, nose, lips, forehead*

*dS continues reading Naruto Manga*

10 minutes later

dW : *sigh* cannot sleep la. sing me a lullaby.

dS : huh? i'll do better. close your eyes and listen close.

dW : close dy.

*dS plays lullaby posted by The Dude at Kommies a few days back.

dW : *eyes snapped open* wtf? *pinch pinch* now i'll dream of dancing in the trees and changing dress every few seconds.

dS : kehkehkeh, u asked for it what? close your eyes and try to sleep la. lol.

dW : cheh!

5 minutes later

dW : *humming twinkle twinkle little star*

Corpse Bride

Presenting subjects which are typically dark and frightening and show them in a positive light has long been a trademark of Tim Burton. In the director's latest film, "Corpse Bride", Burton spins death and murder into a charming musical about the power of love. Burton applies the same technique as with his last stop-motion picture, Nightmare Before Christmas, but with a more fluid and smoother effect. Lead by the vocal talents of Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, "Corpse Bride" is a terrific achievement of film-making.

Lasting just a bit over an hour, this horror love story is simply superb. I just love the cool one-liners. Keep an eye out for a Gone with the Wind spoof.



I'm sure Tim has created yet another wave of soft toys, key chains, coin purses etc with this movie as that of Nightmare Before Christmas. Prepare yourselves. Corpse Bride will be the talk of the town. 9/10 halos for this movie.

Oh yeah... you are bound to be asking the following questions.
1) Who wrote the music?
2) Where can I download it?
3) Where can I get the music score?

Here are the answers.
1)Danny Elfman
2)Here
3)Page 1 and Page 2

Bastards!

Source: The Star

I have to admit. I've eaten tiger too. To my defence, I didn't know. I was still in primary school. It was after I ate that dMom told me it was tiger meat. Except for the novelty of knowing you ate exotic meat, there is nothing much to scream about.

The meat taste like mutton. Texture is that of a dog. Yes, I ate dog too. Do not believe in its healing properties or magic uses. Those are pure sexed up stories. All you will feel later is guilt. If you don't feel guilt, then no prize in guessing who is the animal. Here is a proposal, those of you who wants to try tiger, go capture a pariah dog, skin and BBQ it. That way, you'll be doing society a favor by getting rid of pariah dogs as well as satisfy your curiosity.

Oh! To the hunter who captured the above tiger, I hope they poke toothpicks under your fingernails one by one until each of your fingers and toes are filled with toothpicks! In fact, they should chain you to a telephone pole outside and let the public poke you with toothpicks too. If you scream, your mouth will be stuffed with tiger dung. When you die, your limbs will be fed to the tigers in the zoo. Hmm... maybe not, they should let you live. Enough to run and scream then throw you into the tiger pen at the zoo. Pandai-pandai trap tiger, now your turn la.

Tongue Twisters

Peter bought a butter,
The butter Peter bought was bitter,
So Peter Bought A better butter,
To make the bitter butter better.


How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
He would chuck, he would, as much as he could,
and chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would
if a woodchuck could chuck wood.


Which witch wished which wicked wish?


Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers?
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?


She sells sea shells by the sea shore.
The shells she sells are surely seashells.
So if she sells shells on the seashore,
I'm sure she sells seashore shells.


A flea and a fly flew up in a flue.
Said the flea, "Let us fly!"
Said the fly, "Let us flee!"
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.


Betty Botter had some butter,
But, she said, "this butter's bitter.
If I bake this bitter butter, it would make my batter bitter.
But a bit of better butter that would make my batter better.
So she bought a bit of butter,
better than her bitter butter,
And she baked it in her batter,
and the batter was not bitter.
So 'twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter.


A big black bug bit a big black bear,
made the big black bear bleed blood.


Lesser leather never weathered wetter weather better.


A bitter biting bittern Bit a better brother bittern,
And the bitter better bittern Bit the bitter biter back.
And the bitter bittern, bitten, By the better bitten bittern,
Said: "I'm a bitter biter bit, alack!"


Mr. See owned a saw.
And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw.
Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw
Before Soar saw See,
Which made Soar sore.
Had Soar seen See's saw before See sawed Soar's seesaw,
See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw.
So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.
But it was sad to see Soar so sore
Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw!


Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep.
The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed shilly-shallied south.
These sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack;
sheep should sleep in a sack.

Yea yea! Raya!

This may be too early, but heck, Selamat Hari Raya too all who celebrates.

Here is a present. Raya ringtones in midi form. There is a bonus wav track too. MIDI Download HERE (210KB)

If its MP3 you are looking for, there is only a few, namely :

Ahmad Jais - Selamat Hari Raya
Aishah - Setitis Cahaya Di Aidilfitri
Anuar & Ellina - Suasana Hari Raya
Black Dog Bone - Cahaya Di Hari Raya
DJ Dave - Menjelang Hari Raya
MP3 Download HERE

****************************************
UPDATE on 10/14/05 1142 hrs

Hail Amir & Uji Rashid - Seloka Hari Raya
Jeffrydin - Musafir Di Hari Raya
M. Nasir - Suatu Hari Di Hari Raya
Man Bai & Raihan - Harapan Ramadhan
P. Ramlee - Dendang Perantau
MP3 Download HERE

****************************************


Puasa tired or not? Need to cook a lot? Here is a simple recipe for Nasi Ayam Special.

Ingredients:

1 kilo dry corn.
1 pot of overnight rice.
A little water.


Steps :

1) Mix everything together until it forms a paste.
2) Then go to the chicken coop behind your house.

Kurr .....kurr ... Kurr .......

Serve lah your chickens.

Serves 20 chickens and 10 chicks.

"Selamat berpuasa... banyakkan bersabar"

Bored? II

A little bird forwarded a mail to me this morning. This is what I got.

1) Go to www.google.com
2) Type in "Failure", without the quotes
3) Instead of hitting "Search" hit "I'm feeling Lucky"

Still bored? Go here and then tell me if you still are. :P

Mynah Misadventure

This is a mynah bird. Isn't pretty? Intelligent. Dark. Mysterious.

One sunny beautiful day, in the small and tranquail of Jerantut, people were just waking up. Some has left for their offices and shops. Some are on their way to the market; chatting with their friends not minding the traffic, as if the road belongs to them.

A man was opening the metal doors to his shop. A lone man. The street seemed to be empty of any sign of life. Metal rubbed against metal as the doors slide up. "hello, hello", the sound of the Mynah greeting the man. He allowed himself a smile. Happy. "good morning baby", wished the man.

*click, clack, click, clack, click, clack........* oh uh, the sound of two SYTs on heels walking by. The SYTs were chatting amongst themselves. Totally oblivious of the surrounding. "FFFFFFFFFFWWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT FFFFFFFFFFFFWWWWWWWWWWWWWWUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii", went the mynah.

Looking left and right, the SYTs checked around them for the source of the wolf whistle. They stared at the man who froze when he heard the wolf whistle too. There was not another man in sight. SYTs were still staring. The man pretended he did not hear anything, dripping of cold sweat, he nervously continue with his chores, ears red and swearing at the mynah under his breath. The SYTs walked on.

Car Park Gal I

dS : selamat pagi kak. *hands over car park money*

car park gal : seeeee laaaaaa maaaatttt pppaaaa gggiiiii diiiikkkkk.

dS : aik! kenapa sedih je?

cpg : takde lah. ngantuk.

dS : laaa ngantuk ngantuk pun, pakai cantik je, baru raya ke? cam nak gii berjoget pulak.

cpg : *smiles broadly* ishh, tak lah, baju lama. *posing, posing*

dS : ahhaha, tengok, dah tak ngantuk. hahahah babaiz.

cpg : have a nice day dik. :))

fwd : Cool Theorems

***********************************************************
Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose
will begin to itch.

***********************************************************

Anthony's Law of the Workshop

Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible corner.
***********************************************************

Kovac's Conundrum:

When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged
tone.

***********************************************************

Cannon's Karmic Law:

If you tell the boss you were late for work because
you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a
flat tire.

***********************************************************

O'brien's Variation Law

If you change queues, the one you have left will start
to move faster than the one you are in now.

***********************************************************

Bell's Theorem

When the body is immersed in water, the telephone
rings.

***********************************************************

Ruby's Principle Of Close Encounters

The probability of meeting someone you know increases
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen
with.

***********************************************************

Willoughby's Law

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't
work, it will.

***********************************************************

Zadra's Law Of Biomechanics:

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to
the reach.

***********************************************************

Breda's Rule:

At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from
the aisle arrive last.

***********************************************************

Owen's Law:

As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your
boss will ask you to do something which will last
until the coffee is cold.
***********************************************************

Problogger?

Wanna be a problogger? Wanna earn so much cash that you light your ciggarette with a 10 bucks note like Wingz aka Rojaks Daily?

He has at last announced his probloggingness. Go get some tips from him at the link above. Remember, however much you earn after this, 2% goes to dSaint's Education.

Sekian Terima Kasih. Public Service announcement end.

Music Tag

Thanks to Mr.Rkaru, here is my post for today. *shruggs*

The last CD I bought:

Original? If original, I think it was Da Game Is To Be Sold, Not To Be Told by Snoop Dogg. Pirated? Probably Michael Bublé's self titled album.


Song playing right now: A Perfect Circle's "Imagine" (John Lennon cover)


Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me:
(in no particular order)

1. Lodi Dodi - Snoop Doggy Dogg
2. Highway Star - Deep Purple
3. Light my fire - The Doors
4. Bad day - Fuel
5. Colour Blind - Counting Crows


Five people to whom I’m passing the baton:

I'll stop my part of the tag here. I'm sure I've tagged enough people in my previous tags to fill up a Toyota Unser. But feel free to tag yourself if you feel like it. Cioaz

Tak Puasa

Its weird. Ramadan in KB is so so weird. Hard to find a place to eat as expected. Whats weirder, even if there is a place to eat, its quite open, so its damn uncomfortable to eat coz all the muslim people can see you.

I was so shy about that when not only muslims can see me stuff my face, I was being served by muslims! Man, how they control themselves I don't know. The smell alone made my stomach growl. I think their pahala was piling like bonuslink points.

Luckily there were some magazines around for me to bury my head in.

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dW and I was talking about burgers the other day. I mentioned that the quarter pounder in Australia is different from the quarter pounder here. She commented on my eating habits when I was there. Heck, there wasn't much choice, one person in our group of 4 is a vegetarian. Thank God McDonald's there serve vegetarian burgers.

It got me thinking, Malaysia has a lot of vegetarians too, why don't they serve them here? Heh! McD heard me I guess. Yesterday morning, on the way to Port Klang, we stopped by Awan Besar R&R for breakfast. The only place open was McD, so in we went.

Lo and behold!!!


Its damn syok! Especially when its freshly made. Crunchie and slightly hot (spicy). Its like eating solid parappu (dhal curry). The accompanying vegs are fresh and crispy too.



This burger is a winner in my book. Kudos to McDonald for hearing me. Hmm... I wonder if they bugged my car. Oh well, if you are, contact me McD execs, I have tons more ideas to improve you.

Yesterday

100505. Wednesday morning. Woke up at 0500 hours. Got ready.

Left the house at 0520hrs. Drove to KLIA. Was listening to 95.8, Fly FM. Will Smith was playing.


Git on the floor!!!!! Whoa! I'm the Party Starter,
You might have a good time but we party harder
So, tell the DJ to play my song
& we could dance all night to the early mornin'


I was enjoying that song with the head bopping and all when I looked up and realised that I drove past the KLIA exit. Now the only exit I have is the Seremban exit. No choice. Pedal to the metal. 190km/h. No give two shits to any speed traps.

After the U-turn, the traffic was a bit heavy. All three lanes.

dS : father lord, please lord, let me get to KLIA in time. please keep me safe at this speed. please keep the car from breaking down now, most of all, please get these jokers off the fast lane. thank you. thank you. thank you oh holy and mighty Jesus.

Amazingly, the fast lane started to clear. Again I went as fast as my Lolita can take me. Lolita and I arrived at KLIA five minutes before the checking counter close. Weighing my options on whether to park my car first then check in, or check in first then park, I quickly made the decision in favour of the latter.

dS : hi, good morning.

AA Girl : good morning, in a rush?

dS : abuthen? u think i'm having my morning run meh? yeah, u r closing right?

AAG : u r in luck, i was just about to close. here u are. u need to go in now.

dS : err, i havent park my car.

AAG : *GASP!!!* go. go NOW! RUN Forrest dS run. u must be in the departure hall by 0710hrs.

dS : 15 mins? tiuuuu... kthxbaiz

When I got to Lolita, who else but the Men in White walking towards her. He had his clipboard and pen ready. I did not give no fuck. Popped into Lolita and drove the hell outta there. As I drove past MiW, he was staring after in a dumbfucked kinda face. LOL. Who gives a shit at this point.

Parked my car, ran all the way to departure hall. Time? 0709 hrs. 1 minute to spare. SonOfAcibaily, I had to wait till 0730 hrs to board the bird. Sigh... waste my time running only. As I sat down to wait, my legs started to cramp. I had to keep walking.
Later, I said a thank you prayer again and prayed for a good trip to Kota Bharu, asking for smooth work flow, etc etc.

Believe me, prayer works. In my 3 years of working here. Whenever I go to one of these trips, shit always happens. If not the modem spoiled, its the leased line down. Else theres no power in the building or rat bit the cables. Again, amazingly as soon as I hook my router up to my modem, the signals kicked in and my job was done before NOON!!!

Now I gotta wait till 2130 hrs for my flight back which is a damn bitch. Imagine a place where you know no one. No where to go. Nothing to do. I lepaked at KB Mall, had lunch at Secret Recipe (their spags meatball is cool), people watch a few hours, then remembered I have a friend who opened an ice cream shop at the new Pantai Timur Hypermarket. Went to visit him, hung around a few hours enjoying free ice cream then decided to go to the airport.

On the way I remembered Binx telling me about the market where the food is superb, so I swung by. It was jam packed. I couldn't find a place to park my rented car, so I went beach exploring. A short drive to Pantai Cahaya Bulan, another short drive to Pantai Sabak (can't remember the exact spelling) then to the airport to take a nap.

Had time for a 1 hour nap, went up to KFC to buka puasa along with KBians, check in, watch Rambo - First Blood on my laptop, played a few Star Craft missions before they call for boarding. 2130 hrs.

Finally the plane took off at about 2200 hrs. I didn't pray on the flight back. Guess what, I couldn't find Lolita!!! By the time I found her(was looking at the wrong level), drove back, it was already 0100 hrs. So dead tired was I that I couldn't sleep. Chatted a few minutes with dW, took a long hot bath, checked my mails, read a book and finally dozed off around 0300 hrs. What a day.

Random Thoughts I

1) I think I'm losing my memory. I drove to and from KLIA today 100% relying on road signs when I know I have the route in my head.

2) Its funny. Light n Easy was playing a chinese song. I was singing to it. The next song was Mariah Carey's "I still believe". Amazingly, I was singing it in chinese. I only realised that at the second half of the song.

3) Have you ever enjoyed your drive so much that you didn't realise that you were driving? I remember I went to Petronas right after exiting KLIA parking. The next thing I know, I've parked my car and shutting down the engine.

Dreadful

Such dread. It feels like being held at the end of a plank. No escape. Far below are sharks, hungry with the smell of blood. A sharp tipped sword on the other end, slowly poking into my body if I stop walking.

How? How? No choice, have to go means have to go. Tomorrow morning I'll be flying to Kota Bharu. 0740 hrs. What the fuck! So early in the morn. Worst, I have to catch the 2100 hrs plane back to KL.

Worst!! Tomorrow is the start of Ramadan! All those Customs officers will be cranky as hell. Damn it! Hmm... I guess I will have to puasa along too. Unless places like KFC, McD still opens. *prays all will go well*

Tagged by Piggy

Just as I was thinking about posting sometime, I can across Piggy's tag. Oh well, here goes...

7 things I plan to do before I die
One - Sky dive
Two - Deep sea diving
Thr33 - Climb up Everest
4our - Fly a plane (remote control is good enough)
5ive - Honour God
6ix - Keep up my love for My love
Se7en - Travel

7 things I could do
One - stop smoking
Two - shave my whole body bald
Thr33 - build back my 6 pack
4our - increase my stamina
5ive - watch less tv
6ix - go less online
Se7en - excercise more

7 celebrity crushes
One - angelina jolie aka bj lips
Two - kiera knightly aka fair and lovely
Thr33 - kakashi aka cibai funny hamsap ninja
4our - james dean aka mr.rebel
5ive - sherlock holmes aka smartass
6ix - john clark aka double tap
Se7en - john lennon aka peace man

7 Often Repeated Words
One - wtf?!!
Two - Ooooo
Thr33 - cheh!!
4our - fuucccckkkkKKKK!!
5ive - ha?
6ix - uh...
Se7en - emmmmm...

7 physical traits I look in the opposite sex
One - just look at dWife
Two - just look at dWife
Thr33 - just look at dWife
4our - just look at dWife
5ive - just look at dWife
6ix - just look at dWife
Se7en - just look at dWife

7 victims I can tag
One - Renae
Two - BINX
Thr33 - Pikey
4our - Einazani
5ive - KancilKiller
6ix - Mossie
Se7en - Double Happiness